Well, we are officially on Baby Watch here in the Dukes’ house. Baby number three is due to arrive September 9th, but from day one, I have had a gut feeling he would be here early. I had my other two boys at 38w3d and 38w0d, my water broke both times and I went straight into active labor, so thought this little guy would be the same.
I started having labor symptoms around 36w4d. Lots of consistent contractions, back labor, etc. In the last week and a half, I have been to the hospital three times. Twice for contractions thinking it was the real thing and once to check on leaking fluid, that turned out not to be my water. Each time, I have heard that they bet I will be back later that night or the next day - meaning, they thought the real thing was coming very soon. I feel like such a newbie. You would think I would know what real contractions feel like after having two kids, but apparently, I don’t! My other labors were quick so I guess I haven’t wanted to stay home too long in fear of having the baby at home or in the car.
It has been such an emotional rollercoaster and has been messing with my mind FOR SURE. I am constantly torn between wanting him here NOW and wanting him to stay cooking a little longer. I have had terrible lightning crotch (LOL - look it up!) and hemorrhoids (oh yippee!), along with consistent contractions and back pain for weeks now. Plus, can you really blame a mama for wanting to meet her sweet boy?! I seriously spend ALL DAY daydreaming about meeting him. BUT, on the other hand, I know it is best for him to stay put for as long as he wants so he grows and develops and much as he can. We do not plan on having any more babies, so I know that this pregnancy is most likely my last and I need to soak it up as much as I can.
Last week came and went with no baby, so this week, I have really had to change my mindset and be real with myself. I am only 38 weeks along, so I may not meet my sweet boy for another few WEEKS. I thought he would be here before Ben starts Pre-K, before his orientation, before my sister goes back to work for the school year, but reality is setting in that he might not be, and it is OK! My life has felt like it has been on hold lately, just sitting around waiting to go into spontaneous labor. On Sunday, I forced myself to get showered, curl my hair, actually GO to the grocery store, run errands, workout and meal prep for the week - just like I would on any other typical week. I can’t tell you how good it felt to just go about my normal routine and distract myself from wanting to meet my baby boy.
Today, my sister and I took the boys on a little nature walk. We did 2.10 miles while the boys enjoyed a donut and some sunshine. We laughed, we talked and it was so good to get out. Afterwards, we headed to the park so the boys could run off some energy. They are doing construction at the playground we went to since it is part of a school and I loved watching Ben’s excitement as he watched them work and dig in the dirt. That boy LOVES his job sites!
This week has taught me, or should I say reminded me, how important our mindset is. I can focus on the fact that I am in pain, wanting to go into labor, dreaming about meeting my boy - OR - I can focus on this incredible time I have with my two boys and how blessed I am.
When I had Ben, I worked up until 15 minutes before my water broke. I didn’t have time off to rest, relax or soak up the end of my pregnancy. Nesting took place only on the weekends and I didn’t have time to just relax before welcoming him into the world. This time, I have worked sparingly for the last several weeks. I have worked REALLY hard over the last 6 years to become my own boss as a fitness coach. I have been able to work from my bed, later in the day so I can sleep in and some days, not at all which has allowed me LOTS of time with my boys to do fun things with them in the middle of the week. We have gone on lots of walks, played at home, gone to the zoo twice, etc.
So that is where I choose to focus…gratitude.
Gratitude for my job and the flexibility it allows.
Gratitude for the time I get with my two boys before they become three.
Gratitude for extra sleep, knowing a full nights sleep will be non-existent here soon!
Gratitude for evenings with just my hubby and I after the kids go to bed.
Gratitude for a healthy baby boy who is comfy on the inside, getting stronger and stronger everyday!
Gratitude to for my body to be able to carry three precious boys.
I can’t wait for the day where I can introduce my third sweet boy to you all, but in the meantime, I am choosing to enjoy what I have - my boys, my hubby, extra sleep, quality time and a healthy boy that we will meet very soon!